“If you want to change the fruit, you have got to change the roots. If you want to change the visible you have to change the invisible first”

T.Harv Ecker


Valentine’s day is the best excuse for getting cheesy and giving your best relationships the love they deserve.


This Valentine’s day why not pay some attention to the relationship that’s integral to your overall wellbeing – your relationship with money.  A healthy relationship with money leads to financial confidence, satisfaction and way less stress given that money worries are one of the key ingredients behind our anxieties.

Here are some tips to building a healthy money relationship.


Make managing your money one of your top priorities

And no, this is not about chasing money for ostentatious purposes at the expense of everything else in your life, this is about making money a part of your decision-making process so that you can build a financially stable life for yourself and your loved ones. A position that provides flexibility and choice, the ability to follow your dreams, the capacity to reduce financial stress for your family and the resources to make the changes you want to see in the world.


Making managing your money a priority means building your financial education, clarifying your financial and life goals,  creating a budget to meet these goals, keeping on track with your plan by putting systems in place to support consistent saving and investing, paying down debt and managing your expenses effectively.


Treat your money with respect


Respect means honouring and valuing your money. This has nothing to do with “the love of money being the root of all evil”, it’s acknowledging the value of your money as a tool for creating what you want.


And valuing your money means practising mindfulness when you exchange it for something else. Is the exchange consistent with what you want in your life? Does it equate to or exceed using your money to build your freedom? If the answer to this is not an unequivocal yes, might this not then be an exchange of your money for less than its value to you?


Do not be discouraged by temporary setbacks or disappointments


No relationship is perfect. In the same way, you shouldn’t expect your money relationship to consistently be perfect.


There are times when you may feel frustrated, disappointed, envious, overwhelmed or impatient and this may translate into an unhealthy financial response such splurging on a “feel good item” or a regrettable financial decision, like jumping into some get rich quick scheme. 

When these things happen, it’s easy to fall into the guilt, shame and regret trap but this doesn’t serve you and in fact perpetuates the cycle.


The key is to acknowledge there is a lesson for you to learn in this. Discover the lesson by compassionately uncovering your triggers and the driver behind your actions. Knowing the story, forgive the action and celebrate the knowledge this lesson has guided you toward taking more aware and empowered actions in the future.


As with any relationship establishing a healthy money connection will take time and effort but for those who stick it out, diligently nurturing it to each new level the rewards along the way will be immense – financial confidence, financial stability and ultimately financial freedom.


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Hey there!

Michelle here,

You want to become financially independent and grow your wealth?

You are in the right place.

I help women build their financial intelligence. This means we talk money, earning it, saving it, investing it and growing it.


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